Cohost writing prompt: @Making-up-Mech-Pilots — Mech Pilot who is Jack Black
Welcome to your newly installed cortical piloting interface! Please wait while the first-time setup wizard gathers information on your neurology. Do not connect any cables to your mech until instructed to do so.
Please be aware that, during first-time setup:
- 40% of pilots experience transitory nausea. This is normal; please continue while you wait for the feeling to pass
- 36% of pilots experience feelings of vertigo, particularly during the portions of first-time setup that calibrate visual cortex integration. This is normal; please continue while you wait for the feeling to pass, or if severe, pause setup until you feel confident to continue
- 22% of pilots experience hallucinatory sensorimotor feedback, or "phantom movement syndrome". If you feel as if your body is undertaking physical movements, while simultaneously aware that it is not, please press the medical notification button beside your left hand; staff may take routine notes for the purpose of future research. This is normal; please continue while you wait for the feeling to pass, or if severe, pause setup until you feel confident to continue
- 12% of pilots experience hallucinatory voices. If you experience speech, either intelligible or not, other than any synthesised by the first-time setup wizard, press the medical notification button beside your left hand; staff may take routine notes for the purpose of future research. This is normal; please continue while you wait for the feeling to pass, or if severe, pause setup until you feel confident to continue.
- 7% of pilots experience hallucinatory Jack Black. This is both normal and harmless. If Jack Black appears to be co-piloting your mech at any time, please continue while you wait for the feeling to pass, or if severe, pause setup until you feel confident to continue. You must also comply with this simple checklist:
- Press the medical notification button beside your left hand immediately. Staff may take routine notes for the purpose of future research.
- Do not engage with the hallucination of Jack Black.
- Do not speak to the hallucination of Jack Black.
- Do not agree with the hallucination of Jack Black that this is "awesome".
- Do not encourage the hallucination of Jack Black to sing.
- If the hallucination of Jack Black offers to show you the route to the "secret planet of Rock", do not engage your mech's piloting systems.
- In the unfortunate event that your piloting systems become engaged while hallucinating Jack Black, immediately ensure your mech's position reporting system is online.
- 3% of pilots experience heart palpitations. This is normal....